Monday, September 27, 2010

Hit & Run bc

Have I told you guys about what an awesome thief I was?
iz true, iz true

Well, from ages 5 to 9 it was just chewing gum from the local grocery
chocolates too
but na, clorets chewing gum, it's fucking amazing (I wish I knew that word back then, that way maybe my parents would understand why I couldn't stop stealing it. Totally worth the deformation of my butt cheek)

But yeah, I got bored. Time to level up bitches.
So did I tell you I loved computer games?
Did I ever tell you how my parents never really bought me games?
Well, they didn't. So I resorted to theft (which was just like being in a game, so try it yo)

Here's a list of the games I stole:
1. Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone (PC)
2. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (PC and Game Boy Colour)
a) for the PC game I had to go in the shop twice, I forgot the serial key sticker inside the box. So I automatically get extra credit right?
3. Wolverine's Revenge (PC) - WHAT A GAME! O.O
4. Tomb Raider : The Angel of Darkness (PC)
5. The Simpson's Hit & Run - fml

Let's talk about that last game.
So I was doing well
I had stealth mode on B)
I was tiny, so nobody really noticed me
But damn those 700mb limit CDs
So I managed to tear the plastic seal
I also managed to open the box
I saw the CD
Took it out
Stuffed it in my pants
Walked out
Pulled the CD out in a corner and said "I'm the baus bitches"
but wait
CD 1 of 2?

So I went back in and tried to be as swift as I could and took the second disc out.
I turn around, an Asian guard was RIGHT behind me.
I tried to play it cool (silly child..)

Moments later I was in the manager's office where the manager just got off the phone with my dad. The next few minutes he scared the balls out of me how I'd be expelled from school and my head would be shaved and my eyebrows too. Bastard...

Well, parents had a talk with the manager
I felt so damn sad, even asked my mommy for a hug.
You know what she said? NO >.>

Anyways, got back home and- well, you know the drill *looks back and examines his bottom*

The only good part was, I got to take the game home and even play it a month later.

DISCLAIMER : This is a work of fiction and any resemblence to characters living or dead is purely coincidental.


Friday, September 10, 2010

They're trying to bite me...but I am..MOORA MAN!

Any criticism is accepted here
Not in my Facebook inbox

Ayesha Chinoy (A nixor Shark) :Guys u r like worshippng d wrong person ok??i can very well explain u d purpose of all this.atcuaaly ali umer whorver that person is wont understnd coz he himself takes tution frm our watts d use explainin hm that it is 4 d bettrmnt for own society.well our soviety cant accept ppl whp do good thngs around here.and this guy beettr learn how to respect hs teachrs.hs mailing wont effect our idea and mission much coz we hve already gaind a lot of ppls trust in jus 2 yearz and ppl actuaally took admission i r wasting ur it 4 a betr thng ali umer.and bdw if nixor was a business making organisation it would hve expnded its own instiution rather dn we all beleieve in nixor and sir nadeem that we r a sucess 2day.
Qs for ali:and bdw evn if its a money mking institutuion u hve a prob wid that??jus bcoz lyceum is making losses due to it??thats exactly wat sir omair said that lyceum would be making losses wid pride wen we were doin a ques on a institution making a loss..and i am pretty sure sir nadeem will give u a bettr mail to shut ur mouth 4ever..

Hiba Badar:
well now this is how an educated man talks. and I dont really know what people from lyceum have against Nadeem Ghani or the students of Nixor, but abusing the dean is definitely not the way to go.


how about you explain it to me then? what do you think is the future of someone at acacia who wants to get in an ivy league?

secondly, I do not take tuitions, Lyceum has just the right teachers for me.

thirdly, you've misinterpreted my mail...
I never said NIXOR was a money making organisation
I didn't even say Acacia is
All I said is what I and several other high school students (from lyceum, southshore, grammar AND NIXOR) can't wrap our heads around the idea of Acacia and the only conclusion we get to is that Ghani wants to make money, but I asked him to correct me if there was something else in his head.

nd bdw evn if its a money mking institutuion u hve a prob wid that??jus bcoz lyceum is making losses due to it??

This sentence made you lose so much respect from me (not that you would care)
you think I sent this mail because I'm in Lyceum?
think again
I'm not like you
school rivalry isn't how I roll
The sole motive of why I sent this mail because I was sorry for the people who are attending acacia. that is all.

Hida Badar
Sure, that's the way an educated man talks
but, assuming that 'people from lyceum' have anything against Ghani and Nixor, is wrong.
People from Nixor, Grammar, Lyceum, City and many other schools have been discussing their views about Acacia, and how they couldn't understand what the idea about it was. I brought all that to Nadeem Ghani by email.
For my motive, please read the above reply.

PS: Please reply on my blog next time
oh and chinoy,
The Dean didn't send me a mail that 'shut my mouth 4ever'
read the reply on my blog

Wednesday, September 8, 2010


You are correct in that your tone is very disrespectful. Email is not the right channel for these types of questions/allegations. Please make an appointment to see me and I can discuss the logic behind Acacia.

***Nadeem Ghani , Dean , Nixor College For A levels ***

Acacia 'School' of A levels.

To the Dean,

Sir, I have a few questions about Acacia.
First of all, what is your motive? I mean you're admitting relatively weaker students to Acacia, who were 'unlucky' in their O levels. And you're planning to shove 11 hours of studies per subjects per week down their throats. Moreover, you don't offer much ECA's (in your reply please include more or less most of the ECA's you DO offer)
I mean, you seem like a respectable man. I believe you got your education from abroad?
Don't you think universities abroad look at your resume, and take note of the extra curricular's one has, and notonly their grades?
I mean, even if someone in Acacia succeeds and get's 4A*'s, do you really think any of the top universities will accept him?
Or have you already made the assumption that the kid won't get in those universities, so why bother?

Another thing I cannot digest is that you do not offer sciences in your school?
Is that just a rumour or do you?
If it's not, then sir, seriously, I want to know your thoughts.
Is it because you think a person with B's and C's in his O levels cannot handle science?
and that science is a more 'difficult' as compared to sociology, eco, psychology etc?

Assuming that the students won't be able to handle sciences is just downright unfair.
And lastly, charging 25,000 a month? Really sir?
I mean you don't even have sciences, which usually cost the most, and your charges are Rs 25,000?
Please, don't add sciences to your curriculum, I can't imagine how much money you'll be squeezing out from the students' pockets.

I have so much more going on in my head. I can't wrap my head around the fact that how unfair you are being to the students. I hope you have something planned ahead.
Because...frankly, the only logical explanation I can think of is that you want to raise money. I'm sorry to make that assumption about the Dean of Nixor College, but I am a mere student.
You have every right to correct me.

Please excuse me for any disrespectful things I might have said, but I guess you should know how a teenager vents.

Ali Umer


PS: Acacia offers science. I found out minutes after I sent the mail.
Fees: Rs. 60,000 a month.
GA Ghani

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

College. University. ya ok

CAUTION: I'm NOT hinting to you that university is unnecessary; there is another point to this. So by all means, get an education *steps away*

I'm supposed to be applying to universities in a few weeks
and well
I haven't really done my homework. Don't know where to apply. Don't know what to apply for? Don't know what country to prioritise. UGH


If I had known Harvard and all these fucky ivy leagues looked back at you 9th grade reports, I would've repeated 9th grade if I had to.
BUT wait for it
in ninth grade
harvard was just a 'oh cool it's a university' thing. I really didn't know what importance it had. Did I know I had to prepare for university already? No way man..
The only universities I could name then were Harvard, Yale (which for a larger span of my life I thought was a company that manufactures keys and locks), Oxford and...well karachi university.
I had no idea I was gonna grow up man..and I guess there are a lot of you out there who can empathize. What are we fuckers gonna do?
Okay so no university might not be the end of life
then what..get lucky? how many of us are gonna get lucky?
man, I met this rickshaw driver a few days ago
And well, we made conversation as he dropped me home
he said he was in college (that's 11th and 12th grade according to a local educational board in Pakistan). He wanted to be a surgeon. He was a very bright student too. Well versed in English and everything. But during his final exams, his mother passed away
his father, lost all hope and just forgot that he had 6 children to take care of.
This man, he was the eldest. A sense of responsibility overwhelmed him. He skipped his biology exam, he had to be there for the burial, the legalities and for his now weakened family.
He couldn't go back to college, he felt, next to his family, this was all just...trivial. He started working. A small job, after another. He saved up enough money to send his siblings, three of them if I remember right, through school AND UNIVERSITY
I asked him why he didn't complete his education?
he said something it doesn't it's didn't make sense to me..still doesn't..
his brother is part of the Pakistan Nuclear Regulatory Authority, maybe he's not entirely truthful, but I wanted to believe him
I know, now question come up like ' WHY DIDN'T HIS BROTHER HELP HIM OMG OMG'
the answers, he said he was happy with life
he said he's worked as a fruit vendor, a cook, a driver, a carpenter, labour at a construction site, as a rickshaw driver and so much more
but I know
he lacked education
and I know my post is really weird now started out different..but whatever
famous people are different (<<<<---------- ME ME ME)



Wednesday, May 19, 2010

All you need is love, love , love..

So, I write this blog in hopes of, one day, being famous. YES. I WILL BE FAMOUS. I DON'T KNOW HOW BUT I WILL. AND YOU(yes you), WILL HELP ME.
And I will repay you, with something of such great value.
Wait no,
not even love. TRUE LOVE ( This blog isn't letting me make them hearts that look like something eating the number three, so here you go, something so much more real )

Now, didn't that just make your day?